When Brainspotting Feels Quiet: Understanding the Uncertainty Principle

How Expectations Form in Brainspotting

Most people who come to me have never heard of Brainspotting. They don’t arrive with strong assumptions about how it works or what it should feel like. Usually, they’re simply looking for relief and are open to trying something new.

The expectations tend to form later, after I explain the process.

Even when I’m clear that Brainspotting is not predictable or linear, people naturally begin to imagine what a session should look like. The mind wants something solid to hold onto when stepping into uncertainty. That impulse isn’t a problem—it’s human.

Who David Grand Is and Why Uncertainty Matters

Brainspotting was developed by David Grand, a psychotherapist who discovered that where a person looks can access deep, subcortical processing in the brain. One of the core principles Grand emphasizes is the uncertainty principle—the idea that Brainspotting works best when neither the therapist nor the client tries to control or predict what will happen.

In Brainspotting, the nervous system leads, not the mind.

Even when clients understand this intellectually, uncertainty can be uncomfortable. Once they hear that Brainspotting can access deep material, the mind often starts scanning for signs—emotion, sensation, memory, or some internal marker that confirms the session is “working.” That’s usually when expectations quietly take hold.

When the Nervous System Chooses Quiet

In my experience, many Brainspotting sessions are quiet.

The gaze settles. The body steadies. Sensation may soften or narrow. Emotion can feel distant or muted. This is often the moment when people start wondering whether they’re doing it wrong or whether the spot they’re holding is actually doing anything.

From a Brainspotting perspective, this isn’t a mistake. It’s information.

Sometimes the session feels neutral. Uneventful. Not braced, not emotional, not particularly meaningful in the moment. And then later—sometimes hours later, sometimes days—something shifts. That pattern is part of what I wrote about in Psychotherapy Networker. Brainspotting doesn’t always give you proof while you’re sitting there.

Why the Shift Often Shows Up Later

What continues to stand out in my work is how often the effects of quieter Brainspotting sessions show up outside the therapy room rather than during them.

People notice changes in sleep or energy. They find themselves less reactive in situations that would normally pull them in. They realize they’re no longer scanning as much, managing as much, or anticipating other people’s needs the way they used to. Sometimes the change is subtle. Sometimes it’s unmistakable.

One of the most significant Brainspotting sessions I’ve had was quiet and just a few months ago. Nothing dramatic happened while I was sitting there. But afterward, I found I could no longer overfunction in a particular situation that had been pulling that response from me for a long time. I became angry—but I was also clear and certain about my anger, no longer second-guessing or gaslighting myself. I refused to back down or override my own values. I literally could not lie to myself about the situation anymore.

The old patterns were still there, recognizable and familiar, but they had become intolerable to enact. Responding the way I used to felt wrong in my body and was no longer possible. I even tried to do it the old way for a couple of days, and I couldn’t.

That particular session also came after nearly three years of doing Brainspotting, and that matters. What I’ve learned over time is that there are always new layers unfolding and new things to notice. The veil between my conscious and unconscious mind feels thinner now. I read people more quickly and more accurately. I trust what I sense in a way I didn’t before.

I also care far less about how I’m perceived—or misperceived, for that matter. I used to think loneliness meant having too few people in my life. Looking back, I can see how lonely I actually was when there were a lot of people around me, constantly chasing validation, scanning for approval, and living with a low-grade insecurity I didn’t know how to name, but now recognize as trying to be who other people needed me to be for them.

Now my world is smaller. There are fewer people, but there is also more peace, alignment, and emotional integrity. I feel good about who I am. It’s a version of me I didn’t even know could exist.

That kind of change didn’t come from trying harder or understanding more. It came from watching how things shifted between sessions, not necessarily always during them.

A Note If You’re Considering Brainspotting

If you’re doing Brainspotting—or thinking about starting—and you’ve been wondering whether quiet or neutral sessions mean you’re missing something, this matters. The work doesn’t always announce itself. Sometimes the most meaningful shifts show up later, in how you respond, what you tolerate, and what you can no longer betray in yourself.

If you’re curious about whether Brainspotting might be a fit for you, or you want to explore this work with someone who understands both its uncertainty and its depth, you can learn more about working with me or schedule a consultation through my website.